Think you've got a good thing going with your backyard chickens? You probably don't have anything on Emperor Honorius.
Most historians think Honorius wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the box. Certainly he shouldn't have been entrusted with ruling the Western Empire. Nevertheless, when his father Theodosius I died, Honorius was made emperor of the West at the tender age of nine, with his general Stilicho acting as regent.
Honorius ruled from 393 until 423 AD. The most significant acts during his reign were moving the Western capital to Ravenna, forbidding men from wearing trousers in Rome, and putting a stop to gladiatorial combat (OK, that last one I actually agree with). He was said to have developed a passion for his half-sister Galla Placidia, forcing her to flee to Constantinople to get away from his attentions. He was emperor when Rome was sacked in 410 AD, the first time in 800 years that city had been invaded. Perhaps the only thing you need to know about him was his love of chickens.
Although it may have been an exaggerated or apocryphal story, here's what a historian of the time, Procopius, wrote about Honorius when the emperor learned of Rome's downfall:
"At that time they say that the Emperor Honorius in Ravenna received the message from one of the eunuchs, evidently a keeper of the poultry, that Rome had perished. And he cried out and said, 'And yet it has just eaten from my hands!' For he had a very large cock, Rome by name; and the eunuch comprehending his words said that it was the city of Rome which had perished at the hands of Alaric [the sack of 410], and the emperor with a sigh of relief answered quickly: 'But I thought that my fowl Rome had perished.' So great, they say, was the folly with which this emperor was possessed."
Hence the painting above.
Poor guy. He probably didn't even want to be emperor but didn't have a choice. Think about that the next time you wish you were royalty.
Image: The Favourites of the Emperor Honorious by John Williams Waterhouse, via Wikipedia; image in the public domain.
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